This (The Anger) is that feeling that you get when your boss screams at you without purpose or your kid spills his food on your work clothes. Sometimes it is the maid and her “I don’t care if you don’t like my work” attitude or sometimes it is the biker trying to pull off a stunt in front of your screeching tyres.
That split second of heightened emotion when all you want is to lash out and see the end of it not really thinking about what would be beyond this. So what would you rather do: hold on to it? Or let it all out? There is a lot of research supporting each of the alternatives.
Here then is an article that would make you decide the better way out. But before that take a brief look at why do we get angry and how do you control it before you turn into a fuming, violent, aggressive and obscenely hostile person, people would be happy to stay away from.
Why do we get angry
Anger is an emotion which is an outcome of a feeling of antagonism towards a person or circumstance which you believe is not in your favor or has wronged you in some way. As such Anger is not necessarily a negative emotion. It can be an outlet for negativity that could fill you with bitterness. It could also help you to find a positive outcome for your problems e.g., you could quit a low paying and an over-expectant boss and find your dream job elsewhere. As a result, you would be better off in your career and you would be happy too.
However, excessive anger is disastrous. Increased blood pressure, a high rate of heart attacks or other chronic diseases could harm your health. One could also get into a depression. Such negative outcome can only ruin your physical and mental health and also affect people care for you.
How can we control anger
Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame: Benjamin Franklin.
Well, that’s mostly true. Effective anger management is the key to success. The wise man always uses his anger to his advantage and channelizes his energy to reach his objectives. The goal of anger management is to reduce your emotions as well as to reduce the stimuli which cause anger. You can’t always avoid the things or people who infuriate you but you can learn to control your reactions.
Here are some effective methods for controlling your anger and channelizing it effectively in those moments when you are at the mercy of a unpredictable and powerful emotion.
Short term Anger management Techniques:
• The first step toward resolving any problem is to acknowledge it. Accept the fact that you have an anger problem. This itself is your first step towards effective anger management. Now understand the signs of anger you experience, like breathing more quickly, tension in your shoulders, clenching your fists etc. Whenever you feel these changes happening to you, try to get out of the situation as fast as possible.
• Control your impulse to lash out by counting to 10. Still angry, count backward. It works better.
• Practice breathing in an out. This calms you down and helps you to think more clearly rather than respond based on an impulse.
Long-term Anger management techniques:
• Exercising regularly can help with anger. Running, walking, swimming, yoga and meditation whatever be your fitness mantra, practice it daily to ensure effective stress management.
• Get a hobby. Writing, music, dancing or painting whatever your calling might be, creativity can help you to feel good about yourself and overcome
• Avoid addictions. Smoking, alcohol, gaming and even coffee could make anger problems worse.
• Do not skip sleep. Relax your body after a full day’s work. The importance of sleep in keeping one mentally and physically fit cannot be overemphasized.
• Communicate. Talk about how you feel and why you feel that to a trusted friend.
• Avoid being too rigid on an issue. Put yourself in the opponent’s show once a while and understand why people do what they do. That might just bring introduce a new perspective to you.
All said and done, the first step towards effectively managing anger comes from realizing the problem. If you want to take a quick test on your anger quotient, take this test. It’s free!
If you feel that you need help to deal with your anger do not shy away from taking up counseling. There are anger coaches and therapists who can help you to get rid of the problem. A typical anger management program can stretch anyway from one day to a couple of months depending on the intensity and type of the problem.